One day you will all work for me.

Kurt Hummel. Gay. Fashion guru. Future Broadway star. Stuck in a backwards little town known as lima, ohio. Happily dating Blaine Anderson, otherwise known as the sweetest boyfriend alive.

[RP Account.]

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sassykurthummel:

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Kurt, laughing, pulling himself up onto the table unsteadily, earning him and Blaine cheers from several drunk onlookers, ordering a drink himself. “We’re going to get kicked out.” He told Blaine, ”You and your Napoleon complex.” He joked, taking the drink the bartender handed him a moment later. 

As if on cue, the DJ played Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream. “Oh my god!” Kurt yelled in excitement, jumping up and down (Or as much as one can jump up and down on a table without falling on their ass.) “This song reminds me of you.” He told Blaine. “I think I wanted to date you before you had even gotten to the refrain.”

“It’ll be worth it.” Blaine winked at him, downing his drink. He nearly squealed when Teenage dream came on and grabbed Kurt’s hands, swaying to the music. “Can this be our song? It should be our song. Or is Candles our song? I think I like this one more. Ooooh, maybe Baby it’s cold outside is! Or Animal. Damn, Kurt, why do we not have more songs?”

He nearly fell off the table a minute later. He grabbed on to Kurt tightly and buried his face in his chest to regain his balance. “I think I’m drunk,” he told him seriously. 

“NOOO!” Kurt almost yelled. “Candles is a break up song! Blaine why the heck did you pick that song to try and seduce me with?” He asked him, “Besides this is totally our song.” He said happily. “Though Baby It’s Cold Outside is a close second.” he informed Blaine primly, downing his drink quickly.

Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine’s shoulders, wobbling unsteadily. “Me too. Not as drunk as you.” He looked at Blaine seriously. “Stay close to me, I will protect both of our drunken virtues.” He said solemnly. 

“It was pretty,” Blaine said defensively. “We should like, take a note from Baby it’s cold outside and I can stay at your house for a night and we could have fun. Oh wait, I live with you now, never mind.” 

Blaine giggled when Kurt said that. “My drunken virtue is in danger,” he shouted, hiccuping, hopping down from the table and ordering another drink. “At least there’s not another girl here to make me question my sexuality,” he informed Kurt. 

“YAY!” Kurt cheered. “I just remembered that too.” He said happily, crawling off the table slowly, using Blaine’s shoulder to help him. “And yay for fun too!” He said, launching into a slurred verse of Baby It’s Cold Outside.

Kurt scowled “You said 100% gay! If you have to question your sexuality after you’ve had sex with me I am offended and sad.” He protested. “Besides, every time I think of you and Rachel kissing I feel like I’m going to throw up a little in my mouth.”

“I am 100% gay for Kurt Hummel,” Blaine announced, downing his fifth, maybe sixth or seventh drink, he’d lost count. “I think we should go home and have some fun,” he told Kurt. “But shhhh, we have to be quiet so your dad doesn’t know.”

Kurt quickly finished his drink, frowning. “I’m drunk and you’re drunk.” He looked at Blaine. “Oh my God how are we going to get home? We’ll have to sleep in a BAR!” He cried, throwing himself at Blaine for a hug. “Or call my dad. I’d rather sleep in a bar.”

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ooc: … do you guys really only have taxis in cities? I live in a relatively small town and I see taxis all the time. except you have to, like, call them and tell them where to pick you up instead of hailing one off of the street or whatever. I think I actually see more taxis in my town then I do when I go to the city :/

No I live in a town and we have taxis, they’re just not seen a lot. 

I guess it’s just Kansas then.

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Kurt, laughing, pulling himself up onto the table unsteadily, earning him and Blaine cheers from several drunk onlookers, ordering a drink himself. “We’re going to get kicked out.” He told Blaine, ”You and your Napoleon complex.” He joked, taking the drink the bartender handed him a moment later. 

As if on cue, the DJ played Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream. “Oh my god!” Kurt yelled in excitement, jumping up and down (Or as much as one can jump up and down on a table without falling on their ass.) “This song reminds me of you.” He told Blaine. “I think I wanted to date you before you had even gotten to the refrain.”

“It’ll be worth it.” Blaine winked at him, downing his drink. He nearly squealed when Teenage dream came on and grabbed Kurt’s hands, swaying to the music. “Can this be our song? It should be our song. Or is Candles our song? I think I like this one more. Ooooh, maybe Baby it’s cold outside is! Or Animal. Damn, Kurt, why do we not have more songs?”

He nearly fell off the table a minute later. He grabbed on to Kurt tightly and buried his face in his chest to regain his balance. “I think I’m drunk,” he told him seriously. 

“NOOO!” Kurt almost yelled. “Candles is a break up song! Blaine why the heck did you pick that song to try and seduce me with?” He asked him, “Besides this is totally our song.” He said happily. “Though Baby It’s Cold Outside is a close second.” he informed Blaine primly, downing his drink quickly.

Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine’s shoulders, wobbling unsteadily. “Me too. Not as drunk as you.” He looked at Blaine seriously. “Stay close to me, I will protect both of our drunken virtues.” He said solemnly. 

“It was pretty,” Blaine said defensively. “We should like, take a note from Baby it’s cold outside and I can stay at your house for a night and we could have fun. Oh wait, I live with you now, never mind.” 

Blaine giggled when Kurt said that. “My drunken virtue is in danger,” he shouted, hiccuping, hopping down from the table and ordering another drink. “At least there’s not another girl here to make me question my sexuality,” he informed Kurt. 

“YAY!” Kurt cheered. “I just remembered that too.” He said happily, crawling off the table slowly, using Blaine’s shoulder to help him. “And yay for fun too!” He said, launching into a slurred verse of Baby It’s Cold Outside.

Kurt scowled “You said 100% gay! If you have to question your sexuality after you’ve had sex with me I am offended and sad.” He protested. “Besides, every time I think of you and Rachel kissing I feel like I’m going to throw up a little in my mouth.”

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Kurt, laughing, pulling himself up onto the table unsteadily, earning him and Blaine cheers from several drunk onlookers, ordering a drink himself. “We’re going to get kicked out.” He told Blaine, ”You and your Napoleon complex.” He joked, taking the drink the bartender handed him a moment later. 

As if on cue, the DJ played Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream. “Oh my god!” Kurt yelled in excitement, jumping up and down (Or as much as one can jump up and down on a table without falling on their ass.) “This song reminds me of you.” He told Blaine. “I think I wanted to date you before you had even gotten to the refrain.”

“It’ll be worth it.” Blaine winked at him, downing his drink. He nearly squealed when Teenage dream came on and grabbed Kurt’s hands, swaying to the music. “Can this be our song? It should be our song. Or is Candles our song? I think I like this one more. Ooooh, maybe Baby it’s cold outside is! Or Animal. Damn, Kurt, why do we not have more songs?”

He nearly fell off the table a minute later. He grabbed on to Kurt tightly and buried his face in his chest to regain his balance. “I think I’m drunk,” he told him seriously. 

“NOOO!” Kurt almost yelled. “Candles is a break up song! Blaine why the heck did you pick that song to try and seduce me with?” He asked him, “Besides this is totally our song.” He said happily. “Though Baby It’s Cold Outside is a close second.” he informed Blaine primly, downing his drink quickly.

Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine’s shoulders, wobbling unsteadily. “Me too. Not as drunk as you.” He looked at Blaine seriously. “Stay close to me, I will protect both of our drunken virtues.” He said solemnly. 

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“Sounds fantastic!” Kurt chirped as they pulled into the parking lot of the bar. (ooc: Time skip like whoah) He stopped the car and grabbed Blaine’s hand, eyes twinkling and grin threatening to break his face in two. “Are you ready?” He asked.

“I’m ready,” Blaine said excitedly, stepping out of the car and reclaiming Kurt’s hand as they ran toward the bar.

Kurt sighed happily as they made their way towards the door, squeezing closer to Blaine’s side against the cold until they got in the door. Kurt looked around the semi crowded bar with some trepidation now that he was actually in the bar. A loud dance beat was playing over the speakers and I didn’t even know there were this many gay men in Ohio. 

Blaine felt Kurt’s nervousness and squeezed his hand. “Don’t worry, it’ll be fine,” he said cheerfully, heading toward the bar and sliding into a seat. He quickly ordered two drinks and turn to him, his smile huge.

Kurt smiled back. “I know.” He played it off “I was just thinking that if anyone tries flirting with you I might have to smack someone.” He teased, sitting next to Blaine and spinning around the stool giddily.

He thanked the bartender politely when his drink came, sipping it lightly. “I haven’t had alcohol since I barfed all over Miss Pillsbury’s hideous shoes.” He told Blaine. “Right after I compared her to Bambi.”

 Blaine raised an eyebrow curiously. “I sense an intriguing story, Mr. Hummel,” he teased. “Do tell.”

Kurt shrugged, spinning around once more as he took another drink of the fruity alcoholic thing in his hand. “Weelllll Mr. Shue convinced this older, but very talented, drunk named April Rhodes to finish high school and join Glee Club, and she gave me some kind of weird drink out of a thermos and a bunch of muscle magazines.” He smirked. “I almost got suspended for being drunk at school, and I had a very awkward conversation with my dad when he found them later that month, but I still think she’s fabulous.”

 Blaine laughed, bumping Kurt’s shoulder playfully. “I can see it doesn’t take much to convince you to drink. I’m surprised you didn’t do it at Rachel’s party.”

Kurt blushed, bring the cup up to his lips to hide it. “Uh. Yeah.” He mumbled. “I didn’t.” He said simply. No need to tell Blaine it was because he was still trying to impress him.

 Blaine noticed Kurt’s blush and pressed his fingers lightly against his cheekbones. “You look so gorgeous when you blush like that.”

Smiling softly, Kurt reached up to grab Blaine’s hand, kissing his palm gently. “You’re so sweet.” He told Blaine. “And you’re always gorgeous.” He informed him matter of factly, before spinning in his chair again.

Blaine chuckled, downing his drink and ordering another one. When he finished that one, he grabbed Kurt’s hand and pulled him up. “Let’s dance,” he urged eagerly.

“Okay!” Kurt agreed eagerly, allowing himself to be pulled onto the dance floor, weaving through other dancing couples until they found a spot with enough room. Kurt immediately wrapped his arms around Blaine’s neck and moving close to him, kissing his cheek playfully.

Blaine hadn’t had very many drinks, but he was already feeling drunk and spun Kurt around, laughing as he crashed into him clumsily. “We need more drinks,” he shouted, still giggling hysterically. 

Kurt squealed as Blaine accidently ran into him, grabbing him around the waist to steady both of them. Feeling bold, he leaned forward to kiss Blaine hungrily (Why not? They were in a gay bar) feeling a little tipsy himself. “Drinks later! More dancing!” He declared, shaking his hips at Blaine flirtatiously. 

Blaine grinned and grabbed Kurt’s hips playfully, squeezing them. “You know how Mike said your shimmying was distracting? Well, I like it. You should do it for me now.”

“My shimmying is ‘distracting’ because it’s hot.” Kurt told Blaine, demonstrating the shimmy, his cheeks flushed with the alcohol they’d been drinking. “You’re a super good dancer too.” He said “Even when you dance on the furniture. Which is silly.” He said, dissolving into a fit of giggles.

“Oh you like it do you?” Blaine couldn’t resist, he grabbed Kurt’s hand and led him to the bar, ordering another drink and hopping up on a table, dancing. “Come join me,” he invited, grinning.

Kurt, laughing, pulling himself up onto the table unsteadily, earning him and Blaine cheers from several drunk onlookers, ordering a drink himself. “We’re going to get kicked out.” He told Blaine, ”You and your Napoleon complex.” He joked, taking the drink the bartender handed him a moment later. 

As if on cue, the DJ played Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream. “Oh my god!” Kurt yelled in excitement, jumping up and down (Or as much as one can jump up and down on a table without falling on their ass.) “This song reminds me of you.” He told Blaine. “I think I wanted to date you before you had even gotten to the refrain.”

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“Sounds fantastic!” Kurt chirped as they pulled into the parking lot of the bar. (ooc: Time skip like whoah) He stopped the car and grabbed Blaine’s hand, eyes twinkling and grin threatening to break his face in two. “Are you ready?” He asked.

“I’m ready,” Blaine said excitedly, stepping out of the car and reclaiming Kurt’s hand as they ran toward the bar.

Kurt sighed happily as they made their way towards the door, squeezing closer to Blaine’s side against the cold until they got in the door. Kurt looked around the semi crowded bar with some trepidation now that he was actually in the bar. A loud dance beat was playing over the speakers and I didn’t even know there were this many gay men in Ohio. 

Blaine felt Kurt’s nervousness and squeezed his hand. “Don’t worry, it’ll be fine,” he said cheerfully, heading toward the bar and sliding into a seat. He quickly ordered two drinks and turn to him, his smile huge.

Kurt smiled back. “I know.” He played it off “I was just thinking that if anyone tries flirting with you I might have to smack someone.” He teased, sitting next to Blaine and spinning around the stool giddily.

He thanked the bartender politely when his drink came, sipping it lightly. “I haven’t had alcohol since I barfed all over Miss Pillsbury’s hideous shoes.” He told Blaine. “Right after I compared her to Bambi.”

 Blaine raised an eyebrow curiously. “I sense an intriguing story, Mr. Hummel,” he teased. “Do tell.”

Kurt shrugged, spinning around once more as he took another drink of the fruity alcoholic thing in his hand. “Weelllll Mr. Shue convinced this older, but very talented, drunk named April Rhodes to finish high school and join Glee Club, and she gave me some kind of weird drink out of a thermos and a bunch of muscle magazines.” He smirked. “I almost got suspended for being drunk at school, and I had a very awkward conversation with my dad when he found them later that month, but I still think she’s fabulous.”

 Blaine laughed, bumping Kurt’s shoulder playfully. “I can see it doesn’t take much to convince you to drink. I’m surprised you didn’t do it at Rachel’s party.”

Kurt blushed, bring the cup up to his lips to hide it. “Uh. Yeah.” He mumbled. “I didn’t.” He said simply. No need to tell Blaine it was because he was still trying to impress him.

 Blaine noticed Kurt’s blush and pressed his fingers lightly against his cheekbones. “You look so gorgeous when you blush like that.”

Smiling softly, Kurt reached up to grab Blaine’s hand, kissing his palm gently. “You’re so sweet.” He told Blaine. “And you’re always gorgeous.” He informed him matter of factly, before spinning in his chair again.

Blaine chuckled, downing his drink and ordering another one. When he finished that one, he grabbed Kurt’s hand and pulled him up. “Let’s dance,” he urged eagerly.

“Okay!” Kurt agreed eagerly, allowing himself to be pulled onto the dance floor, weaving through other dancing couples until they found a spot with enough room. Kurt immediately wrapped his arms around Blaine’s neck and moving close to him, kissing his cheek playfully.

Blaine hadn’t had very many drinks, but he was already feeling drunk and spun Kurt around, laughing as he crashed into him clumsily. “We need more drinks,” he shouted, still giggling hysterically. 

Kurt squealed as Blaine accidently ran into him, grabbing him around the waist to steady both of them. Feeling bold, he leaned forward to kiss Blaine hungrily (Why not? They were in a gay bar) feeling a little tipsy himself. “Drinks later! More dancing!” He declared, shaking his hips at Blaine flirtatiously. 

Blaine grinned and grabbed Kurt’s hips playfully, squeezing them. “You know how Mike said your shimmying was distracting? Well, I like it. You should do it for me now.”

“My shimmying is ‘distracting’ because it’s hot.” Kurt told Blaine, demonstrating the shimmy, his cheeks flushed with the alcohol they’d been drinking. “You’re a super good dancer too.” He said “Even when you dance on the furniture. Which is silly.” He said, dissolving into a fit of giggles.

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“Sounds fantastic!” Kurt chirped as they pulled into the parking lot of the bar. (ooc: Time skip like whoah) He stopped the car and grabbed Blaine’s hand, eyes twinkling and grin threatening to break his face in two. “Are you ready?” He asked.

“I’m ready,” Blaine said excitedly, stepping out of the car and reclaiming Kurt’s hand as they ran toward the bar.

Kurt sighed happily as they made their way towards the door, squeezing closer to Blaine’s side against the cold until they got in the door. Kurt looked around the semi crowded bar with some trepidation now that he was actually in the bar. A loud dance beat was playing over the speakers and I didn’t even know there were this many gay men in Ohio. 

Blaine felt Kurt’s nervousness and squeezed his hand. “Don’t worry, it’ll be fine,” he said cheerfully, heading toward the bar and sliding into a seat. He quickly ordered two drinks and turn to him, his smile huge.

Kurt smiled back. “I know.” He played it off “I was just thinking that if anyone tries flirting with you I might have to smack someone.” He teased, sitting next to Blaine and spinning around the stool giddily.

He thanked the bartender politely when his drink came, sipping it lightly. “I haven’t had alcohol since I barfed all over Miss Pillsbury’s hideous shoes.” He told Blaine. “Right after I compared her to Bambi.”

 Blaine raised an eyebrow curiously. “I sense an intriguing story, Mr. Hummel,” he teased. “Do tell.”

Kurt shrugged, spinning around once more as he took another drink of the fruity alcoholic thing in his hand. “Weelllll Mr. Shue convinced this older, but very talented, drunk named April Rhodes to finish high school and join Glee Club, and she gave me some kind of weird drink out of a thermos and a bunch of muscle magazines.” He smirked. “I almost got suspended for being drunk at school, and I had a very awkward conversation with my dad when he found them later that month, but I still think she’s fabulous.”

 Blaine laughed, bumping Kurt’s shoulder playfully. “I can see it doesn’t take much to convince you to drink. I’m surprised you didn’t do it at Rachel’s party.”

Kurt blushed, bring the cup up to his lips to hide it. “Uh. Yeah.” He mumbled. “I didn’t.” He said simply. No need to tell Blaine it was because he was still trying to impress him.

 Blaine noticed Kurt’s blush and pressed his fingers lightly against his cheekbones. “You look so gorgeous when you blush like that.”

Smiling softly, Kurt reached up to grab Blaine’s hand, kissing his palm gently. “You’re so sweet.” He told Blaine. “And you’re always gorgeous.” He informed him matter of factly, before spinning in his chair again.

Blaine chuckled, downing his drink and ordering another one. When he finished that one, he grabbed Kurt’s hand and pulled him up. “Let’s dance,” he urged eagerly.

“Okay!” Kurt agreed eagerly, allowing himself to be pulled onto the dance floor, weaving through other dancing couples until they found a spot with enough room. Kurt immediately wrapped his arms around Blaine’s neck and moving close to him, kissing his cheek playfully.

Blaine hadn’t had very many drinks, but he was already feeling drunk and spun Kurt around, laughing as he crashed into him clumsily. “We need more drinks,” he shouted, still giggling hysterically. 

Kurt squealed as Blaine accidently ran into him, grabbing him around the waist to steady both of them. Feeling bold, he leaned forward to kiss Blaine hungrily (Why not? They were in a gay bar) feeling a little tipsy himself. “Drinks later! More dancing!” He declared, shaking his hips at Blaine flirtatiously.